


Drink Tap Water and Breath the Air

by writersneverdie



Series: I beg your pardon, this is my secret garden [2]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Freshman Year, International Student, M/M, University of Minnesota, Winter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-10
Updated: 2013-11-10
Packaged: 2018-01-01 00:39:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1038281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writersneverdie/pseuds/writersneverdie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At the beginning of February, Brendan suddenly becomes hyper aware of the amount of his feelings for Alex. Maybe it is all the Valentine’s Day commercials, or the dragging on of winter, or the maybe it’s the fact that Alex is fucking awesome and he somehow seems to think that Brendan is awesome, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drink Tap Water and Breath the Air

JANUARY 

It’s a quiet New Years for Brendan. He spends it at home with his family and a couple of his cousins. They spend the two hours leading up to midnight watching the ball slowly drop, drinking champagne and playing a rowdy game of Apple to Apples which Brendan thinks he’s super great at, but none of his family members seem to agree. 

When it’s 10 minutes until the New Year, he and Alex connect via facetime to ring in the new year together. Alex is laying low at home with his family, too. Apparently, Russians don’t celebrate Christmas until New Years (they get a New Years tree and open presents on New Years), so it’s tradition for his family to spend the holiday together. 

The lights of the New Years tree tint Alex’s face in blue. “Are you excited to open your presents?” Brendan asks him low and calm. 

“Yea, I guess,” Alex responds. “Truthfully, I am more excited for the day after new years.” He smiles soft and it makes Brendan’s chest feel tight for a moment.

“I can’t wait to be back,” Brendan tells him, “You have no idea how ready I am to be back there.” They are silent for a few beats, staring at the pixelated versions of the other. “You know that lighting makes you look really...beautiful, Galchenyuk.” 

Alex’s teeth look blue when he smiles. “You think so, huh, Gallagher?” 

“Yea, I do.” 

“Well I think the lighting of your house makes you look super manly.”  
_____

He takes the light rail from the airport to downtown,Target Field to be exact, because Alex has a meeting that morning and can’t come pick him up right away. It’s a long ride, about 45 minutes, being that he’s taking it basically from start to finish. But he’s enjoying it because it’s a different view on the city and it’s people. 

The people that step on at the airport are a much different breed than those that get on at Lake Street and it’s refreshing to actually have a first rate look at the cross section of people that live in the city he’s kind of fallen in love with over his first semester here. He smiles at those who glance at him when they get on and at least 50% of them make some sort of gesture back, some good, some downright weird. It makes him think he should make Alex explore with him a little bit more, venture past Dinkytown and the lakes/Uptown area. 

It’s not until he steps off the train, luggage in tow, that he starts to greatly regret the decision. He might be a true blooded Canadian, but Minnesota in January is still fucking freezing. He pulls the hood on his coat up, tightens the scarf around his neck, struggles through getting his headphones in his ears without taking his gloves off and walks the 2 blocks to Target Center where he takes refuge in the corridor. 

Through some stroke of absolute luck, Alex pulls up in front of the building no more than 30 seconds later. He can see a girl in the passenger seat of the car Alex exits. He meets Brendan half way between the doors and the car, smiling huge and cute as fuck in a hat with ears. 

“Welcome back,” he says hugging him tight. 

“Thanks,” Brendan says in return, looking at Alex in a bit of disbelief that they are in front of one another again. 

Alex grabs the luggage out of his hands and begins talking as they walk to the car, “My sister insisted on coming with me because it’s a rental car and I’m not supposed to be driving it and my mother said I only could take it if someone else came with me. I think she wanted to meet you and this is her excuse because they are leaving tomorrow and yea,” he gets out before they reach the car in some sort of beautifully accented fast speak. Brendan has to say every word in his head as he hears it to be able to understand it all as quickly as it is being spit at him. 

“Cool,” is what he manages to get out before he is jumping into the backseat of the brilliantly warm car which fittingly has Florida license plates.

The first thing Brendan thinks when Alex’s sister turns her head around to greet him is that she is stunning. Gorgeous in a real way which he can totally appreciate. 

“Hi, I’m Anna,” she says in an accent he’s completely used to now.

“This is my sister,” Alex says like he didn’t just tell him about her being in the car seconds ago. 

“Hey! I’m Brendan,” he says enthusiastically. 

“Alex’s boyfriend,” Anna says looking at Alex, whose head is turned the opposite direction, trying to merge back into traffic. 

“Yea, it’s nice to meet you.” They hadn’t talked about the boyfriend title, per-say, but Brendan is glad to hear that Alex seems to have told his sister the same thing he told his. 

“You also,” she says. “I didn’t think Alex was going to let me meet you, but I knew I would find a way.” 

Alex looks over at his sister fondly and rolls his eyes, “You do always get what you want.” 

“Of course I do!” Anna responds and they both laugh at the inside joke. Brendan can’t help but smile and look at Alex. He’s finally back in Minnesota with his boyfriend. And his beautiful sister seems cool and Alex obviously loves her which makes him even more amazing. He’s got sisters so he understands and he’s so glad Alex does, too. 

They pass the rest of the car ride in easy conversation about Alex’s new job as a Russian tutor for one of the guys on the football team and Brendan’s classes. It’s a nice friendly conversation. 

When they make it to the front of his dorm building he doesn’t want to casually say goodbye to Alex and leave but he’s ready to do it to not make this situation with Anna awkward. Thankfully, Alex announces he’s going to help Brendan with his luggage before he even gets the car in park. He practically jumps out of the car when he does, opens the trunk and has his bag on the curb before Brendan has the chance to say goodbye to Anna. 

“It was really nice meeting you,” he says opening the door. 

“You too. I will see you again, yea?” Brendan nods. “You better go, he doesn’t like to wait and he’s been waiting to see you for three weeks now.” He’s sure his cheeks go red and he manages to wave a quick goodbye before getting out of the car. 

When he opens the door Alex is standing with his luggage in hand, eyes blue and bright in the cold air. “Hey, you’ve got your keys,right?”

Brendan pulls them out of his pocket and they walk to the building side by side, shivering and smiling. He opens the door and immediately pushes Alex to the corner of the stairwell out of the way of the door. He kisses Alex there, initially soft and sweet, then long and lingering. 

“Feels good to do that again,” he says when they break away. 

“Yea,” Alex says back and then dives back in for one more. Two more, then three. “You want me to carry your suitcase up to your room?” 

“I think I can handle it, you don’t want to keep your sister waiting too long,” Brendan says taking his bag from where Alex has set it near the door. 

“She’s fine,” Alex says and kisses him again, quick. “See you tomorrow?” 

“Yea, call me after your parents leave,” he says starting up the stairs. 

Alex nods his head and pushes the door open with his back. He beams up at Brendan for a second longer before he turns around out the door.  
_____

The start of the semester happens both fast and slow. The new schedule, classes and prospective assignments make the days go by quickly. But, the nights spent in his dorm room with Nick, which is nice, but without Alex, which fucking sucks, drag along. Alex has training, tutoring, or informational meetings every night during the first week of classes and even though they are now within the same city limits Brendan finds himself still missing him. 

And the little moments they get do get to spend together-in the cafe in the science building (Brendan’s taking basic biology, Alex is taking some chemistry class which he only got to sign up for because he did PSEO in his last year of High School (he moved back to the US to do so) and has an entire year of credits coming into his freshmen year) or when Alex will walk him back to the bus stop after he’s done for the day and then ride back with him to the front of the building where he does his tutoring-Brendan aches for more. More time, more touch, more anything Alex. 

The second week of the semester he finally has a night off. 

“That means you’re taking me out, right?” Brendan asks him as they are standing at the bus stop after World History class. 

“Out where?” Alex says smiling, lips trembling from the cold. 

“To dinner, to coffee, to the basketball game, to your bed, anywhere.” 

“You’d want to go to the basketball game?”

Brendan shrugs his shoulders instead of saying something sappy as hell like ‘I’d go anywhere with you.’ 

He can see the bus coming, it’s just at the stop one block up, and the punishment of the cold air doesn’t make Brendan want it to be there any sooner.

“I asked my roommate if I could have the room tonight,” Alex says as the bus is making it’s way down the street. 

“Yea?” He knew Alex had to have done something to plan for tonight. 

“He said I could have from dinner time until the library closes.” 

Brendan bumps his shoulder into Alex’s as they get on the bus and sit down in the few empty seats next to each other near the back. 

“I’ll take you out first, though, if that is what you want,” Alex says quiet and grinning. 

“Yea, I mean, whatever, we don’t have to.”

“I want to.”

“Alright, if you want to,” Brendan says. They are almost at Alex’s stop and then he has to go through the rest of the afternoon without him sitting next to him, warm and tall and beaming. 

Alex grips his thigh with his gloved hand and puts his mouth next to Brendan’s ear. “Be at my door at 6:00, sharp,” he says leaving his space next to him and exiting the bus.  
_____

When Brendan gets to his dorm room Nick is there sitting at his desk with a book open and a look of serious frustration. 

“You okay there buddy?” Brendan asks him. Out of the collection of months they have lived together, he can count on one hand how many times he actually witnesses Nick studying. “You don’t want to strain something.” 

“Fuck you,” Nick tells him. 

“What are you studying for?” Brendan asks because he is a caring roommate. 

“Psych. Hey, do you think Alex would tutor me?” 

“Would he? Yes. Should he? No.” Brendan doesn’t need another reason for Alex to not be able to hang out with him. Nick knows this, he listens to the complaining more than anyone. 

“Oh, right. Don’t want to cut into your precious boyfriend time, sorry bro,” Nick says. He knows this is Nick being both annoyed and genuine at the same time. “You got an A though right? With his help.” 

“Yea, I got an A but,” he starts and then pauses because he will not let Nick win this. He might always get his way in every other part of his life, but not here. Not with this. 

“But, you’re too greedy to share, or,” says Nick. 

“Shut up, why don’t you join the study group like I did.” 

“What if we make a deal. You can have the room both Friday and Saturday night every other weekend to spend time with your Russian genius, if he will help me get an A in psychology.” He says with so much cool confidence, Brendan hates him for it. Because he knows he hit the one thing that would make him bend and it sucks. 

“Fine,” he says, exasperated. “But, only if we get it overnight at least one of the nights.” 

“I will drive all the way home to Eden fucking Prairie every night if you just convince your boyfriend to help me get an A in psychology.” 

Brendan holds a hand out for Nick to shake and says, “Deal, motherfucker.” 

He brings it up to Alex via text, who immediately answers with a ‘tell that shithead he’s getting an A plus’ and a few seconds later ‘tell him he’s got to wash the sheets every time too.’ Because his boyfriend is a fucking evil genius. 

With the promise of so much alone time with Alex in both the immediate and not-so-immediate future, Brendan is able to comfortably take a nap before their date. He sets an alarm for 5:15 so he can take a shower and make himself presentable before they go to wherever it is that Alex is taking him. 

When he makes it to the dorm building, fresh after shave and minty breath, Alex is waiting for him at the door. He’s got his coat on looking ready to bring his boyfriend out in public. However, after he gives Brendan a hug, nuzzling his face down into Brendan’s neck he says, “Fuck it,” and pulls him up the stairs instead of out the door. 

“I thought we were going out,” Brendan says in mild protest. 

“We will later.” 

Brendan’s laughs, loud and echoing through the stairway. He did want Alex to take him out, but the way his ass looks in those jeans as he pulls Brendan up the stairs changes his mind quickly.  
_____

FEBRUARY

At the beginning of February, Brendan suddenly becomes hyper aware of the amount of his feelings for Alex. Maybe it is all the Valentine’s Day commercials, or the dragging on of winter, or the maybe it’s the fact that Alex is fucking awesome and he somehow seems to think that Brendan is awesome, too. 

He can pin it down to a moment. They are at the hockey house on a Thursday night. It’s not exactly a party because it is during the season and the boys cannot get caught drinking, so it’s more a group of people hanging out. It’s nice. Brendan likes to party but ever since the start of this semester, he hasn’t been in the mood. 

It’s a handful of the hockey players (the ones that live at the house-P.K. and Carey always manage to be the center of attention whether it be on the ice or in their living room), a couple girlfriends, Prusty (he always seems to be around-Alex told him it’s because he tutors all the guys in the house) and Brendan, Nick and Alex. Alex is invited by Prusty and Brendan is invited by Nick. So, they have an excuse to be together and social at the same time. 

Brendan is sitting in the kitchen with Carey and Nick talking about snowmobiling. Nick did it growing up every winter at his uncle’s cabin up north. Brendan did it a few times with one of his good friends from middle school. Carey’s never been and is jealous, but knows he can’t because coach might literally kill him if he found out he had been engaging in dangerous activities during the season. 

Alex is in the living room with Prusty and P.K. laughing mostly, judging by the sounds making their way into the kitchen. Brendan can kind of see into the room where they are. The doorway gives him a sight line to the couch where Alex and P.K. are sitting. He can see P.K. telling a story, gesturing wildly with Alex paying close attention to his every move. 

At some point, during a lull in his conversation and a high point in Alex’s, Brendan looks to the living room at the same time that Alex throws his head back onto the couch looking towards the kitchen and they lock eyes. The moment it happens the features on Alex’s face soften and he smiles with an intense fondness at him. They keep their eyes locked for another 10 seconds, before their attentions are given back to their respective conversations. 

That’s the moment when Brendan realizes he is completely in over his head.  
_____

Nick breaks up with his girlfriend during winter break, and he hasn’t found a new one yet which Brendan thinks is a little unusual. He’s met Nick’s high school girlfriend, at the lake during the fall, and she told him he can’t go 3 weeks without someone new. It’s not that he’s doesn’t care about the girls he dates, she tells him, it’s just that he can’t go too long without someone calling him every night before he goes to sleep. Brendan laughs when she tells him this amazing little factoid, but she doesn’t seem to think it’s funny. She tells him it’s the honest to gods truth. 

So, Brendan is a little worried about his roommate. Because, it’s been at least 6 weeks since the break up and he’s sulking. He makes vomit noises everytime he and Alex show some affection for one another. It’s getting annoying and pathetic. 

It’s a weekend where Nick is supposed to go home for the night to give him and Alex the room, but Alex has to go to some awards banquet thing for the student athlete tutors so he asks Nick for a raincheck. 

Instead, he and Nick play video games. He tries to convince Nick for at least 20 minutes to find a party to go to, but gives up after Nick tells him to go fuck himself for the 5th time. 

“Your moping is on epic levels of pathetic,” Brendan tells him as they are on their 3rd game of NHL. 

“Your moping is,” is all the comeback Nick has for him. 

“Bro, come on, what happened?” 

Nick answers him with some chirp about the game. 

“Come on, man. You never told me what happened,” he tries again. 

“She broke up with me, not much more to it than that.” He tries to say it matter of factly, but it doesn’t totally come off that way. 

“And you’re not getting back on the horse? Going out and meeting someone new?” 

“Nah,” is all he gets in response.

“It is fucking impossible to get you to do anything.” 

“You should talk, it’s Alex, Alex, Alex all the time with you bud.” 

Brendan wants to protest, remind him about how he hard he tried to get Nick to party with him tonight. But, he knows it won’t get him anywhere. 

“I know,” is what he says instead because Nick is right. “It’s kind of freaking me out, honestly.” 

“Alex’s freaky, eh?” Nick says finally smiling. 

“Not like that, it’s just like, I’m a freshman in college in America. I should be getting out there and partying and hooking up with hot dudes. I’m not supposed to be, like, falling in love.” 

Nick doesn’t say anything back to him. They return to concentrating on the game entering a companionable silence to which they have grown accustomed. 

After the game is over, Nick turns to him and says, “So you’re in love, eh?”

Brendan takes a deep breath, sighing a little bit as he exhales. “Yea, I mean, I don’t know. Most likely. Yes.” 

“You don’t want to be in love with Alex? Because he is pretty solid dude.” 

Brendan definitely sighs this time. “I know. It’s not Alex, he’s fucking.” He pauses, trying to come up with the word, or words.

“No, okay, I get it,” Nick says before he can continue. “I feel the same way about my girl, so I get it.” 

Brendan looks over at Nick feeling sorry for him. He didn’t realize how much Nick is into her, he must be heartbroken. Shit, now he’s feeling insensitive. 

“Except my girl broke up with me because I’m not smart enough, or hip enough, or too clingy, or some shit and Alex seems to love you just as much as you love him.” 

“Sorry, man. For real. She’ll come around, I bet.” 

“Maybe,” Nick says looking out the window to the group of kids walking down the sidewalk in the cold, dark winter night. “But, if you ask me, Bren, don’t give up on Alex for some bullshit pressure from, like, society or whatever to hook up with as many people as possible when you’re young.” 

He looks over at Nick in a little bit of awe. “That tutoring is paying off, eh?” he says and they laugh letting out some of the tension. 

“If you ask me, you’re lucky. I’ve always kind of wished I would be one of those people that married their high school sweetheart, but that ship has sailed,” Nick says trailing off at the end of the thought. 

That makes Brendan stop and think about things, about Matt and how he had fun with him, but how his relationship with Alex feels so much different. 

“Maybe you’re right,” he says to Nick. This is the most personal conversation he’s ever had with the kid. He thinks he lucked out on the roommate front, too. 

Alex texts him when he gets back from the banquet: ‘you’re dating an award winner-consider yourself a lucky guy.’

‘i really am’ is how Brendan responds.  
_____

He tries to start appreciating a little bit more after the conversation with Nick. He also tries to do what he can to cheer Nick up and/or encourage him to go out and meet some new people. He get Alex on his side, who gets Prusty on the case, and by the end of the month he agrees to go out on a double date with Brandon and his girlfriend. 

“If this works out, we are actual cupids,” Alex says to him on the night of the date. They are obviously taking advantage of the room being open for at least a few hours on a day that isn’t prearranged. 

“You think?” Ever since Brendan got Alex a Valentine’s day card with a cupid on the front, he’s been obsessed with talking about them. Apparently, it is not a huge thing in Russia. Valentine’s Day to Alex meant writing your name on Batman cards for all the kids in your class and getting a lot of heart shaped candy because he moved back to Russia around 4th grade. 

“Yea, I mean that’s what it means, right? You make a love match.” 

Brendan laughs because it is not often that he is more of an expert on a subject than Alex. “Something like that. I am not expecting the kid to fall in love, though. I am just glad he’s out doing something instead of sitting in his room playing video games and studying.” 

“You know what we should do this weekend?” Alex asks from his place on Brendan’s chest. They should probably think about getting up soon and taking a shower, Nick could be on his way back soon and they have an agreement about the smell of the room post Alex visit. 

“Huh?” 

“We should go play hockey at some local rink, maybe on one of the lakes? I bet Nick will agree now that we hooked him up.” 

They have suggested getting out on the ice with Nick a few times, but he never takes the bait. It seems he has a lot of sensitive subjects, and for some reason hockey and his ex are somehow combined and completely off limits. 

“Great idea,” Brendan says. “I’ve been wanting to get out on the ice with you guys to see if you are all talk.” 

“Prepare to be blown away, babe,” Alex says raising his lips to his.  
_____

MARCH

They don’t find time to get to the rink until the first weekend in March. The outdoor rinks at the local parks are all still open. They stay that way until they literally melt. 

“You know March is historically the snowiest month of the year,” Nick says in true Minnesotan fashion. 

“I am just glad it is above zero,” Alex says from the backseat of Nick’s car where he is sitting with Prust. They are driving out to Eden Prairie because Nick only agreed to play with them if they go back to his old stomping grounds.

“Don’t get your hopes up, I think it is supposed to drop back down to sub zero this weekend,” Brandon tells them. 

“You all complain too much about the weather,” Brendan says. Canadians just suck it the fuck up. 

“Oh, sorry, Mr. Canada,” Alex says, making Prusty and Nick laugh. 

“Fuck you guys,” is his comeback. Then, “Just wait until I embarrass you all at shinny.” 

It takes longer than Brendan is expecting, but once they get there he’s impressed with how nice it is. He knew from his time around campus that Eden Prairie is one of the nicer of the suburbs-home to many local professional athletes (the ones that don’t live on Lake Minnetonka, at least)-but he didn’t expect to see incredibly well kept sheets of ice and a decently sized warming house. He understands why they call this the State of Hockey now. 

The warming house is manned by a couple of high schoolers who brought their own 30 inch flat screen and X-Box in to pass the time. Nick knows them and they seem excited to see the return of their former captain. 

Nick has invited a handful of his teammates from his team last year and they arrive soon after they do. It’s enough guys to play 5 on 5 with 2 goalies. Brendan is in fucking heaven, he thinks as they make their way out after getting their skates on. He’s playing hockey again. He’s justifying the $50 his parents spent to send him his skates and, better yet, Alex is here trash talking him like he’s going to be better than him. 

Brandon takes the honors of throwing the sticks to different sides to choose teams. He and Alex end up on the same team. 

“I was kind of looking forward to crushing you,” Alex says as they are picking up their sticks after the selection process. 

“Sorry babe,” Brendan says quietly, “Looks like we’re going to have to find a way to work together.” 

Alex smiles and taps him on the ass with his stick, “I think we’ll figure it out.” 

The only equipment they have is gloves, skates and sticks, so their isn’t much contact. It’s more a skill and speed based game which plays greatly to Alex’s strengths. It turns out he IS better than Brendan. He’s smooth and has sick hands. Brendan didn’t think he could possibly be more attracted to Alex, but after seeing him play hockey, he is. 

Prusty and Nick are on the opposite team and make a great D-pair, but Brendan manages to hold his ground against the two of them in the offensive zone. He, Alex and Landon (the other guy on their line) get set in their roles quickly and soon after Brendan’s got two goals. Both of which were assisted by Alex. 

“This isn’t even fair,” Nick proclaims when they take a water break. “You guys can probably like read each other minds or some shit.” 

“Why would you say that?” Alex asks. He’s sweating and smelly and Brendan is so into it. 

“Because you have some sort of like sex connection thing,” Nick says and everyone stares at him with looks of judgement. “It sounded better in my head. Shut up.” 

Brandon laughs and the other guys look like they are trying not to look uncomfortable. 

“You’re just jealous we are better at hockey than you, Captain Leddy,” Alex says saluting him. This manages to make the other guys laugh. 

“Whatever, let’s get back out there,” he says. Everybody jumps off the boards and eagerly get back into playing position. 

They play until it starts to get dark and when they pile back into Nick’s car, exhausted and smelling like hockey, Brendan feels so fucking satisfied.  
_____

The most promising thing about March is spring break. Brendan hadn’t thought about the specifics of the week, but he is glad to have an entire week without school. College isn’t exactly the most difficult thing, but that doesn’t stop every student from feeling like they deserve a week off. 

A week before break, Brendan’s biggest plan for the week is enjoying the fact that he will have the room to himself for the entire week. Nick is going to Mexico with his family because that’s what a family like his does. 

Alex had planned on meeting his family in Canada where his dad was going to be on work, but gets roped into helping out a few struggling basketball players instead. It’s the first time Brendan’s happy Alex takes on another tutoring job. Because he’s more or less blocked off 7 whole days of Alex, his dorm room, and Nick’s X-Box with his Netflix account. 

When Brendan gets back to his room after class on the last Friday before break, Nick is frantically trying to get all of his dirty laundry into the bag his mom had brought him during the first week of classes. 

“Chill, bro,” Brendan tells him after he watches Nick wrestle with fitting a pair of jeans into the overfilled bag. 

“Shut the fuck up,” he says without looking up at Brendan. After he gets the jeans in and the bag shut he looks over to where Brendan is sitting and says, “Got a big favor to ask you.” 

“Yea?” Brendan says without looking up from his computer screen. He’s expecting Nick to make some sort of crack about not having sex on his bed. 

“Would you be able to housesit my house while we are in Mexico? My neighbor backed out and we have 2 cats and my parents are paranoid. So, I told them I would ask you.” 

Brendan tries to decide if this is a joke, so he searches Nick’s face for a few moments to figure it out. 

“I mean, no parties obviously, and I guess Alex can come and I told my parents we could trust you, so,” Nick says, looking serious as can be. 

“For real?” Brendan asks him because he’s still a little worried this might be a joke. 

“Yea, for real. Can you do it? You can use my car, and you just have to like feed the cat and clean the litter box and bring the mail in and shit.” Nick is actually serious. He’s offering his entire HOUSE to him and Alex for a whole week. 

“If you’re serious, then yes, of course, holy shit,” Brendan says because he can watch TV on a couch and make macaroni and cheese on a stove. And him and Alex can have a house to themselves. And a car! 

“I’m serious. Thanks, man. You’re really saving our asses.” 

“I actually think you are doing me the bigger favor,” Brendan tells him because he’s going to have access to cable TV and good high speed internet and a shower where he does not need to wear shoes. 

“Okay, buddy. Few ground rules: no sex in my parents bed. No sex in my bed. No sex in front of my cats, and,” Nick says, then pauses to think. “Yea, that’s about it. We leave tomorrow. I will come pick you up tomorrow morning. That cool?” 

“Cool,” Brendan says and then immediately text messages Alex. 

‘I just landed us the best spring break, ever.’  
_____

Three days in, they have learned a few things about themselves and one another. The biggest being the severity of Alex’s allergy to cats. His eyes are so red and puffy he looks like he’s been crying for days. Brendan feels like he has put an entire bottle of eye drops into his boyfriend’s eyes in just three days. They help (after the initial sting which Alex rides out by punching the nearest soft surface and yelling various Russian words, probably profanity) but then they fall asleep on the couch and the cats join them, or Brendan forgets to wash his hands after petting one of the cats while he’s feeding them, or it wears off. 

“Let’s go out to get some lunch, or something, get you out of this house,” Brendan says. They haven’t left yet because Alex hasn’t had to tutor yet. And, the fridge is stocked and Brendan is a decent cook. The TV is hooked to Nick’s Netflix account and they have made it through 3 seasons of Breaking Bad. They can have sex in the shower, and on a couch, and whenever they want. Further, they know this is a fleeting moment. 

“Why would we do that when you make sweet ass gourmet grilled cheese,” Alex says. He’s obsessed with the grilled cheese sandwiches Brendan’s mom invented when he was a kid. 

“Because you look like you got sprayed with a can of pepper spray, babe.” He can’t watch him suffer anymore. He needs to get the kid some relief. 

“I’m fine,” Alex says. When he blinks his eyes it’s looks like his eyelids are sandpaper and Brendan cannot take it anymore. 

“You don’t have a fucking choice. Put a coat on and get in the car, motherfucker,” he says turning the TV off. 

“Bren, come on,” Alex starts to protest but Brendan is already up the stairs and by the time he finishes. 

Alex follows him a few seconds later and Brendan kisses him by the car to celebrate his victory. It’s a mild day outside, warmer than it’s been in a long time so they take advantage and make out in the driveway, leaning against Nick’s car for a few minutes. 

When they manage to pull themselves away from each other, Brendan looks into Alex’s eyes and says, “They already are looking better.” 

Alex nods his head slightly, “They feel better, too.” 

“I’m always right, eh?” 

“Dream on, Gallagher.” 

“Just admit it.” 

“Just get in the car.” 

Brendan listens and gets into the car, huge grin on his face.  
_____

“Do you ever think about what you’d want your house to look like in the future?” Brendan asks Alex on the last night of spring break. They just ate a 3 course meal Brendan had watched 2 hours of youtube videos to make. 

“Sometimes,” Alex says. They are on the couch downstairs, where they have made their home, more or less, for the past week. The allergy meds have finally built up enough in Alex’s system so he’s not in constant pain. 

“A house like this is nice, not too big, not too small,” says Brendan. He’s got to do the dishes and change the laundry but he doesn’t care too much about any of that. Spending this week with Alex in some sort of weird, eager domestication has him thinking about all sorts of things he has only thought about real abstractly before. 

“I wouldn’t want a huge house, but it would be cool to have a decent sized one, with all the amenities and shit,” Alex tells him. 

“Agreed. Or one of those sweet old houses out on Lake Harriet would be cool.” Brendan knows the exact one he would want. He always looks forward to seeing it on his run. 

“We should run the lake soon,” Alex says. The weather is getting a tiny bit better. Some snow has melted, enough to run around the lake, at least. 

“Yea,” Brendan says. “Would you want to live here, in Minneapolis?” 

Alex doesn’t answer right away, thinking about it. “Sure,” he answers after a while, “I mean, I like it here. But, it would depend on a lot of shit.” 

“Yea,” Brendan says, not knowing if he wants to continue with the line of questions. 

“What about you, do you want to stay in Minnesota?” Alex asks looking at him. 

Brendan gives him a quick kiss on the lips. “You know I love it here.” 

Alex smiles, agreeing to Brendan’s statement with his eyes. “You think they would let you in?” 

“You mean to live in the US? Why not? I’m a model citizen,” Brendan says. 

“It’s a long process, you know,” Alex says. His remembers his parents struggles with becoming citizens when he was a kid. Eventually, they moved back to Russia because they were sick of dealing with it. Alex has told him all about the lawyers, and jobs his dad did or didn’t take based on his eligibility to work and live in the US with his American citizen children. 

“I know,” Brendan says. “But it might be worth it.” 

Alex kisses him this time, lingering a bit. “Yea,” he says, dipping his head back down to catch Brendan’s lips again.  
_____

APRIL

By the second week of April, Brendan has missed 7 calls from his mom, 5 from his sisters and 3 from his dad. Rather, he has screened them. He will reply with a text message sometimes with some bullshit half excuse about being busy with homework, or a test, or working out, but mostly it’s because he can’t talk to them. 

He knows why they are calling and he can’t bring himself to deal with it. He cannot give himself an end date on this year. So, he’s being a baby and avoiding the subject as much as possible. He even changes the conversation every time Nick, or Alex, or the person sitting next to him in class bring up summer plans. He’s a coward. 

He’s tried to play out every scenario for the summer in his head. Going back home and working at the rink with his dad like he does every summer. Getting a job and subletting a place in Minneapolis. Taking summer classes and living on campus. Alex going home to Russia for the summer. Alex going to live with his uncle in New York for the summer. Alex staying in Minneapolis to take summer classes. Alex breaking up with him. Him breaking up with Alex. 

None of them seem to work in his head because going home means not being here. And staying here is implausible because he doesn’t think he CAN legally work in the US and his parents cannot afford to put him up. If he takes summer classes he will have to pay for them on his own because his international student scholarship doesn’t apply and he doesn’t want to speed up his 4 year plan. He can’t break up with Alex because he loves him, but he can’t not be with him for the summer while dating him-he just can’t. And, Alex could break up with him because he’s too smart and too awesome for Brendan, and he’s going to realize it if they have summer plans that don’t involve them being together and that’s a real shitty thought. 

Nothing works, and he doesn’t want to talk about it with anyone because he doesn’t want it to be real.  
_____

Alex and Nick try to gang up on him one night while they are all playing video games. Brendan has refused to party with them, and suggests they go without him. This only causes them to make him sit and play his favorite game. Nick goes as far as cancelling his plans with his girlfriend (they’ve reunited) in attempts to cheer him the fuck up. 

“Seriously, though,” Nick says after they let Brendan win 2 times in a row, “What the fuck is your deal?” 

“Nothing,” Brendan says as quickly as he can. Alex rolls his eyes at him. 

“Brendan,” Alex says, rolling his eyes AGAIN. “Come on.” 

“How many times do I have to say nothing before you guys get it through your thick ass skulls that there is nothing wrong with me?” He’s knows he’s not helping his cause with this shitty defense. 

“You are literally more moody than I have ever seen my girlfriend, ever, right now, bro,” Nick says and Brendan knows it is true. 

Alex nods his head in agreement, “Come on, babe, just fucking tell us.” 

Brendan stays stubbornly silent because he can fucking win this game. 

“You’re being so fucking annoying right now,” Alex says. “Annoying and stubborn and fucking, ugh.” 

“Be nice,” Nick says. “He’s going through a hard time with some invisible issue.” He’s smiling though, so Brendan doesn’t actually believe he’s on his side. And, they are both right. Except his issue isn’t invisible, it’s eating him up. 

“Fine,” Alex says. “I’ll be nice, but I stand by my comments.” 

“Fine,” Brendan says and grips the controller a little harder.  
_____

He makes it to the last week of April without voicing his fears to anyone. He manages to perk up a bit and parties with the bro’s from speech class a few times. He’s told them about him being gay and dating Alex, and they are super chill about it. They tell him they knew the whole time, but Brendan knows they definitely didn’t. 

It helps to distract him, and Alex seems to be happy he is out doing shit. He’s been busy with tutoring and class and figuring out what he’s doing over the summer, so they haven’t had much time to spend together. Brendan thinks it’s probably a sign that he’s going to break up with him. So he’s all about distraction, distraction, distraction. 

He runs into some of the hockey guys at one party and Brendan has an epic fucking time drowning with them in their completely unrelated sorrows. Three weeks later, the boys are still trying to cope with losing in the semi-finals at the Frozen Four and Brendan is happy to be a participant in their rounds of crazy drinking games which serve to celebrate the most inane parts of life in hopes that they will help you forget about the disappointing real ones. It works. 

Nick tells him to take it easy during the last weekend of April because they have finals coming up. And, he reveals later, Alex has asked him to get him to spill and Nick agrees. Because he is totally going to get an A in psychology. 

“You’re telling me that my boyfriend asked you to tell me not to party this weekend,” Brendan says, anger forming. 

“Yea, I mean, no. Not exactly. He just,” Nick starts. 

“I thought he was glad I was going out and doing shit,” Brendan interrupts. 

“He was. Is,” Nick says. “Fuck. If you would just tell me or him or someone what the fuck was going on with you, we wouldn’t be so worried about you.” 

“So, you’re both worried about me because now I am going out and doing shit, and before you were worried about me because I wasn’t. What the fuck,” Brendan says. He needs to find a way out of this conversation because he does not want to talk about this shit. 

“Why won’t you answer your family’s phone calls? Why do you change the subject every time someone brings up summer plans? Why do you think that Alex and me are douchebags that don’t care about you?” Nick says, hitting Brendan in all the wrong places with the questions. 

“Nick, please shut up,” Brendan says quietly. 

“No, okay. No,” Nick tells him forcefully, “Because I figured it out, asshole.” 

Brendan whips his head up to look at Nick with a confused look on his face. “What do you mean.” 

“I get it, alright? I get that you aren’t ready for summer to come because then you have to go back to Canada and you don’t want to be away from Alex and you don’t think he loves you or some shit.” 

Brendan slumps his shoulders and stays silent. He can’t think of one thing he can say back.

“I’m here to tell you you’re full of fucking shit because summer is coming whether you want it to or not. And you’re are genuinely an idiot if you don’t think Galchenyuk loves you. For real.” 

Brendan cannot believe him. He can’t and he’s good at avoiding that he doesn’t. 

“Brendan.” Nick continues, “You have to talk about it, okay? Fuck. You have to figure out what to do for the summer and you need to talk to Alex about it. Because, I’m not sure if you realize this with that thick skull of yours, but he’s fucking torn up about you being such a dickhead to him and me and everyone.” 

Brendan didn’t realize because he hasn’t seen much of Alex in the last two weeks. Nick has probably seen him more because their tutoring sessions have become more frequent with the end of the semester. 

“Really?” Brendan says unspectacularly. 

“Yea, really,” Nick stresses back to him. “He asks me about you practically every 5 fucking minutes. He has also started text messaging me on the reg. So get your shit together, Bren.” 

Brendan let’s it sink in for a second. How could it be that Alex is so worried about him? He’s so busy and driven to be worried about some stupid crisis Brendan is having. 

“So now you are going to call him and tell him you want to talk about summer because that’s what’s been bothering you and you were sorry to worry him and that Nick is the best roommate ever.” 

Brendan smiles and looks up at Nick. “Should I use the quote word for word?”

“Probably. Come on, get your phone out.” Nick says getting up as if he will take the phone out of his pocket for him if he has to. 

“I’ll call him, I promise,” Brendans says because he needs a few minutes to gather himself, think about what he is going to say.

“No, you are going to call him now.” He’s coming closer to Brendan, looking like his fucking dad or hockey coach. 

“I will, just give me like two minutes,” Brendan says to Nick, who is now looming over him. 

“Fine, I will call him on my phone,” he says walking away to grab his phone from his desk. 

“Okay, okay, shit. I will call him, calm your tits,” Brendan says. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and gets ready to dial. He takes a deep breath as he gets to his contacts and sees Alex’s name right at the top of the list. He clicks on it, taking one last deep breath. 

“Hello?” Alex answers after the 3rd ring. 

“Hey,” Brendan says back. 

“Bren, hey, what’s up?” 

“Ah, not too much. What are you up to?” He asks. Nick is gesturing for him to get on with it with his hands. 

“Just finishing up some edits on a paper. Nice to hear your voice,” he says and Brendan smiles. 

“Yea, you too. Ah, look, I’m sorry.” 

“For what?” 

“For being such an annoying little shit the last month,” he says earning him a thumbs up from Nick. 

“Oh.” Alex says, then, “That’s alright. You want to talk about it finally?” because he’s a fucking saint. Way too good for him. 

“Uh, yea. I’m mostly just worried about summer and what’s going to happen and I don’t know how to deal with the fact that this year is almost over and it’s going to done and gone and, yea,” Brendan says, trying to get everything out fast. 

“I know,” Alex says sounding so comforting, “I’m worried about it, too, but, you know. Avoiding it doesn’t help anything.” 

“I know,” he says sighing. “I just.” 

“What? Brendan, come say what you’re thinking.” 

It’s so hard, but he has to, he knows he does. “I don’t want to go to Canada and be away from you and I don’t want you to go to Russia or New York or wherever because then you’ll realize I’m some stupid Canadian that he you fun with during freshmen year but we’re too young and you’re too smart for me and then I’ll come back to Minnesota and you won’t want to be with me anymore.” 

He says feeling like he wants to cry, but he doesn’t actually want to cry in his dorm room with Nick listening to every word he says. 

“Huh,” Alex says, then, “Wow.” The ‘o’ awkward with his accent. “I am going to respond to one thing at a time.” 

Of course he is, Brendan thinks, because he’s methodical and careful with everything. 

“And then I’m going to come over and punch you in the face for being such a fucking dumbass.” And he’s sassy, too. Brendan loves him. 

“First, I’m not going to Russia or New York for the summer. Which you would know if you didn’t change the subject every time I tried to tell you.” 

“Thank god,” Brendan says feeling a slight relief. 

“Second, I don’t want to be away from you for the summer either. I don’t want you to go back to Canada, so I’ve been trying to come up with a solution. I think I have one, but you will have to talk to Nick about it.” 

Brendan looks at Nick, who has gone back to studying, but he can tell he’s still trying to listen in. “Okay.” 

“Third, I can’t believe you think that there is any part of me that doesn’t want to be together with you. Yes, we are young. Yes, we are just about to finish our freshmen year of college, but, it doesn’t matter. Because, you are stupid and Canadian but I like you anyways and we’d both be stupid to give up on this just because we’re too young or some other bullshit excuse.” 

Brendan laughs, releasing a lot of built up tension. “You really don’t think I’m too stupid for you?” 

“You serious? You got a full scholarship to a major University, you are not stupid.” 

“Only because they are trying to fill their international student quota.” 

“Bullshit again, Bren. I bet there were a lot of Canadian applicants,” Alex says in a way in which Brendan believes him. 

“So, you’re staying in Minneapolis for the summer?” Brendan asks because even if he has to go back to Vancouver, he’ll feel so much better about it if he knows Alex will be here, right where he left him. 

“Yea, I got a full time job in the tutoring center for the summer and my sister is going to come live here with me in an on-campus apartment.” 

“Nice, that’s fucking great to hear, babe,” Brendan says. He knows now they should’ve had this conversation a long time ago. It would have saved him too many sleep deprived nights and bad test scores. 

“Yea, you gotta talk to Nick about your summer plans, okay? Talk to him and call me back.”

“Okay,” Brendan says because he’s willing to do whatever Alex’s asks him to right now. “I also need to add that Nick made me call you, so he’s the best roommate, ever. He wanted me to tell you that.” 

Alex laughs and says, “He’s alright. Talk to him and call me back, okay?” 

“Yea, okay. Sorry again for being annoying.” 

“You better be,” Alex says. 

“I’ll call you back,” he says ending the call. 

Nick starts applauding the moment he takes the phone away from his ear. Brendan shoots him the dirtiest of looks he muster right now. 

“Alex told me I have to talk to you about my summer plans,” he says to stop Nick’s clapping. 

“Yes, so,” he starts and Brendan has no idea what to expect. “I talked to my parents and they said you could stay at my house if you wanted and my dad said he could get you a job caddying at a golf course where they hosts international caddy’s, so it would be legal for you.” 

The smile that erupts on Brendan’s face is almost painful. “You’re serious?” 

“Yea, I mean, you will have to pull your weight around the house, obviously, and shit, but the guest room is all yours if you want it.” 

“Holy shit,” is all Brendan can say. How did these people happen to him? What did he do to deserve Alex and Nick and Minnesota? “I mean, yes, holy shit.” 

“Talk to your parents about it and let me know, you don’t have to commit to it right now,” Nick says. 

“Yea, okay. I mean, thanks,” Brendan says and he wants to hug the kid, maybe even kiss him right on the mouth. 

“Yea, of course. So, how stupid do you feel about being so fucking mopey for the last month?” Nick says throwing the highlighter in his hand at Brendan’s head. 

“Stupid doesn’t begin to describe,” Brendan says. “Gonna go call Alex back,” he says leaving the room to give Nick some space to finish his studying.  
_____

MAY

They both finish finals fairly early this time and by the second week of May they both only have one more paper to turn in by the end of the week. Brendan and Nick are moving out of their dorm room immediately after Nick’s last test, but Alex is waiting until the move out date because he can’t get into his apartment until the other tenants move out. So, they try to enjoy their last few days on campus together enjoying the nice weather around campus and around Minneapolis until moves out to the suburbs. 

They take the bus out to the lakes every day for a run and spend a couple of hours killing time playing volleyball, or getting tacos at Tin Fish, or walking over to get frozen yogurt at Yogurt Lab. It’s all the things that made Brendan fall in love with the city and he’s glad he gets to share it with Alex instead of trailing behind him trying not to be noticed. 

“You know about how I told you I saw you running around the lake that one time?” he asks Alex as they are sitting at the end of the dock on Lake Harriet watching little kids catch fish after fish. 

“Yea,” Alex says smiling at one of the kids who finally caught his first fish after watching his older brother catch 5 in a row before him. 

“That’s when I knew,” he says. 

“Knew what?” Alex asks giving his attention to Brendan. 

“Just knew,” Brendan says. 

Alex smiles and puts his arm around him grabbing his shoulder. 

A fish flops right next to Brendan, the scaly fin brushing his thigh. The older brother grabs it and throws it back in the water apologizing. 

“No worries,” Brendan tells him looking over to Alex, then out at the lake.


End file.
